Thursday, July 5, 2012

Been Thinking

I've refrained from blogging for quite awhile. I've discovered that I am prone to offend people and so I've tried to keep a lot of thoughts and comments to myself. It's funny to me that for most of my life I've either been called a leader or a rebel. I would assume that whoever it is I'm leading must be too! It's hard for me to understand the offended. If I don't like something I stay away from it. I'm not one who gets offended. If you are I would recommend that you defriend me on Facebook, unfollow me on Twitter and stop reading this now! My goal in life isn't to offend, but to simply be me. I'm ok with you disagreeing with me. Differences in opinion help make the world go round. I love people and I want people to love me and with that comes some odd thoughts and feelings and a whole lot of opinion on things.

Enough about that and on to the main point of this blog. A friend of mine tweeted a quote from John Maxwell earlier this week. John Maxwell is a brilliant man. He's an evangelical pastor, author and speaker. He has written very successful books on leadership. I, in no way, would even begin to claim to know more than he or claim to be an expert on leadership, but I think he has this particular statement wrong. The quote is, "The higher up the leadership ladder, the lonelier it gets." My response to the post was that it was an interesting thought. I've been thinking on that for a couple of days now and I'll tell you my thoughts.

Basically, I don't think it has to be that way. I think it has to do with the way a person leads and the kind of person he/she is. Leaders who are lonely have lost who they are as a person. They've lost sight of what makes them them. Obviously we all change, but I think our core - what makes us tick -remains somewhat constant. Over time leaders bend towards pleasing and try to become what the followers want and need instead of staying true to themselves and who God made them to be. Therefore when they get to the top, they can't have anyone close because then someone may actually see them for who they are. Their "cover" may be blown.

Another reason that leaders are lonely at the top is that often times they've stepped on heads to get there. Once they are at the top the people they've used don't want to be around them anymore.

I think if you polled non-Christians asking them what their biggest problem with Christian leaders is, they would tell you that it's the hypocrisy in the Christian's life. They put on a front out in the open, but behind closed doors they are a different person. I think often times the hypocrisy exists because of the legalistic attitude that Christians have. Christians have determined and set their own standards instead of sticking to the standards in God's word. Therefore leaders feel like they have to succumb to those legalistic ways instead of taking a stand and helping to make a change. As long as we as Christians continue to pretend to be one way when we aren't we will always be berated by non-Christians. Christian leaders must start being the change.

Leaders are also lonely because they aren't willing to jump in and get their hands dirty anymore. They leave that to those under them. They find ways to be "busy" instead of getting in the trenches with the masses to get the job done. When this happens they lose the respect of those they are leading. The following becomes out of some sort of obligation instead of truly being lead.

Bon Jovi (of course you know I can always find a way to bring them in!!!) sings a song called "Lonely At the Top." It's a song that Jon and Richie wrote to Frances Bean Cobain, the daughter of Kurt Cobain. It's a beautiful song that was written as if Kurt was telling her these things. I think Kurt lost sight of who he really was and he couldn't get it back. Here are some of the lyrics:

I was jaded, suffocated, it got too hard to breath
I never got as high as I needed to be
You know life becomes worthless when they steal your dreams
I just couldn't live with what was left for me
And I couldn't run far enough from the truth, what's the use…

You know life becomes worthless when they steal your dreams
I just couldn't live with what was left for me
And I couldn't run far enough from the truth, what's the use…

Before you know you find yourself alone and looking down
No one there can help you stop before you hit the ground
It's lonely at the top…

Didn't mean to leave you all alone but then the music died
Though the song remains the same, I couldn't live that lie…

I love that song. It's a very sad, tender song. I never want to lead if the cost is that I lose myself along the way. God made me unique and special. I want to always be true to myself and who He made me to be. As long as I do those things, no matter whether I'm a leader or a followerer I'll always have people, the ones who truly get me, by my side.

So those are my thoughts on the John Maxwell quote. I would love your thoughts on the topic as well!